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Hello FUBARians...
How
are we
this fine late-third quarter of 2010? Hope all of you found
upward momentum and growth during the second quarter!?
Since last update, the FUBAR Upper
Management has been busy traveling around the country visiting with
former FUBAR players and fans alike conducting what the FUBAR fans have
been calling "Mini-Reunions!" Once again in Central
Florida, Dave "The Dude" met with Mark "hAva-Cup-A-Joe" and Chris "bleeding
heart liberal" Rothy to see how they were doing in their new rolls as
the FUBAR committee chairmen? The Cyber Kid was hoping to
finalize some "possible" plans for a FUBAR 20th Reunion to occur in
either October or November of this year to coincide with Wings & Waves
And/Or Homecoming? Although still holding a
positive attitude about their appointments, Dave made this statement to
press after his meetings; "I still believe these guys are the right
choice for the jobs? Now while they haven't actually completed anything,
I have confidence these two (knuckleheads) will come through in the
bottom of the ninth!?... Maybe?... Hopefully?..." (Editor's
note:
Although it appears that Mark and Chris at the time of this update had
completed exactly nothing in regards to committee duties, FNC is still
saying "confidence is high!" - "Jimbo" and "Doubletree Cookies" are
still being provided forthwith!) |
Chris
"trust me" R's got it covered!? |
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The Cyber Kid was also able to find some time to meet with Jeff
"Underground" E and his (now) sidekick, The A.J.! Although
their talks weren't open to the FUBAR public, rumors were rampant,
causing the Cyber Kid to step outside from the talks and make a
brief statement to the countless fans that gathered; "FUBARians,
sometimes it's just a cup of coffee - really! Look, it's all
good!... Oh, and the A.J. still hasn't eaten anyone!?... Thumbs up
Jeff!" After which he ducked back into the conference!
Despite the comments, fans still speculated on
the "true nature of the talks" with many believing they were about
the possible reunion; the long awaited release of the 3rd Series of
FUBAR Figures And/Or quite possibly a re-release of the non-award
winning FUBAR video documentaries (that posed as highlight reels
back in 1997!) The FNC however could not confirm, nor deny any
of the rumors circulating in the crowd... well, none except that
Jeff is a big sissy...oh and has a giant head - those were pretty
easy to confirm?... :oP
One fan that came all the way from Florida had this to say about the
impromptu meeting of the three; "Come on seriously, he wants us to
believe it's "just" coffee? What do we look like, simpletons?
Last time those three stooges got together, the A.J. was terrorizing
neighborhoods and Mark and Dave were cooking up some plot to take
over the world! And Jeff? Don't even get me started on
what the $#@% Jeff's been up too with all the digging and heavy
equipment he's been buying lately!?...I've seen it a thousand times,
we cant trust them!... Those three are up to something, I smell a
conspiracy!" At which point another fan shouted: "Hey
Armadillo, that you stirring the pot? Sell that long hair
hippy crap someplace else!?" - "Um, no... 'er I'm not Armadillo, I'm
some other guy named... um 'er... Bob - QUICK EVERYBODY SCATTER,
COPS!" <stampede and drama ensued - watch these brackets?...> |
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The Cyber
Kid, A.J. & Jeff "The Handler" at the talks!?... |
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So, with all the hoopla and fanfare surrounding the
20th anniversary of this franchise the following FNC update was "almost" lost is the press.
Destined to not allow this breaking story to be relegated to the back
page or hidden from the FUBAR public, FNC chairman and Editor in Chief
Dave "I get the Scoop" M. made certain that the following FNC story made
the light of day!
THE SILENT ASSASSIN FOUND!!!
That's
right ladies and gentleman, the man, the myth, the legend Noriyuki
"The Silent Assassin" Kobayashi has returned to the FUBAR ranks!
"It was crazy, I was just hanging out and then there he was... came
out of the shadows like a ninja! Craziest thing ever!
But hey we're just glad he's back! Kind of coincidental that
he shows up during our 20th anniversary no? Think he's
thinking there may be some FUBAR-B-Que action coming up!?" The
Cyber Kid told reporters at his Central Texas mansion ('er modest
home that has nothing to do with all the dues you pay!?) about the
return or the FUBAR Star player.
According to FUBAR News agents, apparently Nori, who had gone "dark"
back in 1997 has been off the FUBAR radar for over a decade with no
notification, simply returned. Eyewitnesses report seeing Nori,
still dressed in his 1997 uniform carrying FUBAR News Corporation
paraphernalia (1997 season FUBAR newsletters) entering an eatery
where the Cyber Kid was dining. Greetings were exchanged (as
were back dues) and a couple BEvERageS were consumed (by the ninja)
and the two parted ways. Some skeptics (Mark) think that Nori
may have actually been in contact with the FUBAR Upper Echelon
throughout but FUBARHQ denies such ludicrous claims!
"Poppycock!" was one quote from Jeff "In the dark" E. who
added; "Dave tells me everything, I totally would've spilled the
beans for some free grub if I knew Nori was running around doing
some FUBAR Ninja $#!+"
Anyway, keep track of this developing story as well... we continue
to develop it!?...
In other news, the Cyber Kid once again has unveiled
THREE BRAND NEW posters in the "VOTE FOR DAVE, GET FREE
WINGS!" campaign - enjoy... |
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POSTER #1
- w/ Supporters Christina & Amber |
POSTER #2
- w/ Supporter Brittany |
POSTER #3
- w/ Supporter Ashley |
Oh and if you think the campaigning isn't working, check this out, a
train station (and a street) in New York City were named "23rd" "just"
to honor the Cyber Kid and the FUBAR legacy! Not to mention, looks
like the military has it's sites set on
www.FUBARHQ.com as well!?... Big things are coming folks...
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The
"23rd Street" subway stop in Manhattan |
"Heads
Up!" |
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So, be sure to come
back next quarter when we explain this picture -
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Well that's all for this
quarter, as if that WASN'T FREAKIN ENOUGH!?... Anyway, be sure to check out all the other new Mindful
(In polling; the word "Mindless" was deemed offensive to certain readers
(namely the A.J.) so FUBAR Marketing has decided to "modify" the reminder to
read) -
MINDFUL WEB CONTENT REMINDER
Be sure to visit the newest
in the FUBAR Publishing
News, the FUBAR Entertainment Group repertoire - CHEEKY MONKEY's photo blog/online
journal. UPDATED and sorted by year, the monkey has over 5 albums
and 800+ captioned photos, the monkey is swingin'?...
www.SWINGERMONKEY.net
"He Gets Around..."
And lastly, here's yet another installment of WTF...
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The
"New" Periodic Table! |
Apparently the "Nylon" cage wasn't enough to contain the Kid!?... |
Alright kiddos, it's pajama
time! So brush your teeth, wash your faces and settle in as Uncle
"Creepy" Dave tells you about the time the FUBAR's came from behind to beat
our nemesis "Ground Effect" EVEN though we were short-manned with only 8
players!?....
Until next time, this has been
your faithful reporter dishing out the latest quarterly load of gruel!
Enough FUBAR for ya?!...
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